BY PRIYANKA ARIBINDI, BRIAN BEUTLER 

& CROOKED MEDIA

Tuesday, January 29, 2019

—A heckler at Howard Schultz’s first book event

LEAKY TOILET SALESMAN

Acting Attorney General and future subpoena recipient Matthew Whitaker stirred up controversy on Monday when he told reporters he’d been “fully briefed” on Special Counsel Robert Mueller’s investigation. He also said that he’s “comfortable that the decisions that were made are going to be reviewed, either through the various means that we have” (uh, what the fuck?) and that “the investigation is, I think, close to being completed.”

Whitaker’s inappropriate decision to comment on the investigation, combined with his long record of criticizing Mueller and his refusal to recuse himself, revived concerns that he may have tampered with the special counsel’s office, and that Mueller might thus be winding down prematurely.

Should we freak out? As always, no one knows! But, it’s 2019, so if you’re not freaking out, you’re not online enough.

Here’s what we do know: If Mueller’s truly wrapping things up, he’s trying hard to make it look like he’s not.

• When FBI agents arrested Trump adviser/racist creep Roger Stone for obstruction and witness tampering on Friday, they also raided his properties, which means Mueller demonstrated probable cause to believe Stone was sitting on evidence of additional crimes.

• The House Permanent Select Committee on Intelligence has yet to provide Mueller transcripts of all the interviews it conducted with Russian investigation witnesses over the past two years. And, as Chairman Adam Schiff has suggested, they likely contain more evidence of illegal false statements.  

• In early January, Mueller got a six-month extension on his grand jury in Washington, DC.

On the other hand, there is some reason to suspect we’re at least closer to the end of Mueller’s investigation than we are to the beginning.

• Whitaker has more visibility into the investigation than the defense lawyers who do most of the leaking to the press about it.

• Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein will reportedly remain in his position until the investigation is over, but the official leaks about his impending departure did make it seem like he’ll be stepping down sooner rather than later.

Here’s what we don’t know: We don’t know whether Mueller intends to go out with a whimper or a bang. In the coming weeks, he could obtain more stunning indictments and submit a blistering report accusing Trump of crimes to the attorney general. Or he could do and say very little.

Also, we don’t truly know how to read Whitaker’s comments, which were suspicious but also vague enough to be meaningless. But good news: With Democrats in control of Congress, we’re likely to get to the bottom of whatever he meant soon. He is scheduled to testify before the House Judiciary Committee on February 8.

Empire’s Jussie Smollett was the victim of a violent hate crime in Chicago Tuesday morning. After physically assaulting him and calling him racist and homophobic slurs, his attackers poured an unknown chemical substance on him and put his neck in a noose, according to CNN. Smollett has since been released from the hospital. From Keep It host Ira Madison III: “This is why someone’s jokes about beating their gay son were never funny.”

Under President Trump, the U.S. has experienced a dramatic rise in hate crimes. In 2017 they increased by 17 percent, and of the 7,100 recorded incidents, approximately 60 percent were attacks on the basis of race or ethnicity, while 16 percent were based on sexual orientation. The figures around hate crimes are believed to be underreported, and many victims never see justice.

The leaders of the U.S. intelligence community testified publicly for the first time since President Trump betrayed the country on the world stage in Helsinki last year, and it turns out Trump continues to ignore them and repeat the Russian line and spew bullshit about basically everything. So weird!

Roger Stone pleaded not guilty to seven felony charges of obstruction, witness tampering, and false statements, stemming from Special Counsel Robert Mueller’s investigation.

Reckless former anti-Trump fanclub co-chair and current Trump fanclub co-chair Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC) has advised President Trump to take the debt limit hostage next month, and refuse to increase it unless Democrats fork over funding for a border wall. Congress has until March to raise the debt ceiling, or else the government will default on its many loans and the country will plunge into financial crisis.

Former Georgia gubernatorial candidate Stacey Abrams will deliver the Democratic response to Trump’s State of the Union address next week. California Attorney General Xavier Becerra will deliver the Spanish language response.

Sen. Kamala Harris (D-CA), who launched her presidential campaign this weekend, endorsed abolishing private health insurance in a town hall with Iowa voters Monday night *though her spokesman later indicated that she would not oppose less ambitious plans that would preserve for-profit plans. According to CNN, it "was the most watched cable news single-candidate election town hall ever."

The FBI was unable to determine a specific motive for the 2017 Las Vegas massacre that left 58 people dead, concluding that “it was all about doing the maximum amount of damage and him obtaining some form of infamy.”

Facebook quietly updated its site to block tools designed to provide the public more information about how advertisers are using the platform to target them.

A FaceTime glitch let callers hear the users on the other end before they actually answered. NOT GOOD. Apple says it has disabled the feature that allowed it to happen. So, uh, anyone FaceTime Trump last night? Meanwhile, let’s starting using “facetime” as a verb that means to eavesdrop. It’s fun! Try it.

Teachers in Virginia, Denver, and Northern California are calling for higher funding and pay, a week after teachers in Los Angeles won those concessions after a six-day long strike. In Virginia, teachers rallied at the state’s Capitol, but have stopped short of striking for now, while Denver teachers are set to strike in the near future, and Oakland teachers will vote on whether or not to strike this week.

Owned.

With 77 percent of the population of the continental U.S. expecting below-freezing temperatures this week, President Trump did another dumb tweet:

The fact that the president is a third-rate climate change-denying troll has become a short-term and long-term threat to public health and safety.

Here’s how to help homeless people during this dangerous weather →

Baltimore will no longer prosecute cases of marijuana possession regardless of quantity, and the city’s top prosecutor, Marilyn Mosby, announced that she will try to vacate nearly 5,000 possession convictions. Between 2015-2017, more than 90 percent of the minor possession citations in Baltimore went to black people. Though the Baltimore Police Department says officers will continue make arrests for illegal marijuana possession “until the state legislature changes the law,” those people will not be prosecuted, and first-time offenders charged with felony distribution will be sent to diversion programs.

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